twinkle twinkle


Twinkle, twinkle, Humperdinckel

Wish I was a star.

Zippy, zappy, quick as a winkle

In a fancy car.


I would make a smashing actor

Right for every role.

Act like I am Olivier

Bare my very soul.


I might not have the perfect jaw

Or even perfect skin

But I will deliver killer lines

In every movie I’m in.


I will show up late each day

And slow production down.

I will ignore the director too

And call him a stupid clown.


I will take just any drugs

I’m offered on the set.

I will take on nude scenes too

Any of them I can get.


But mostly I need lots of cash

For mansions full of bling.

I want all the perquisites

Being a big star brings.


‘Cause I am as good as anyone

At sliding down the tubes.

I am not some local yokel,

Not your average rube.


I know the studio makes big bucks

Pushing this video crap.

So I am willing to go the mile

And sit right in his lap.


So bring on seedy Hollywood

Or Bollywood, whatever.

I will do whatever it takes

And won’t cry uncle, never!


Brent Kincaid





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